11012012

Hi all.

Another essay. Obviously I'm in a pensive phase of life.

Whoa 2.32am. Just got jolted awake cos of something *Y*. Anyway work starts at 12pm tomorrow so it's ok that I'm awake. Work right now... In Singaporean term, it's 'shiong'! And it's not 'shiong' as in challenging like doing something which makes you learn new skills. I'm fine with that. It's more of like repeating something mundane over and over again at a very increased magnitude. Ok if you're reading this you probably don't know what I'm talking about unless you're my colleague.

So ladies and gentlemen. Enjoy your school days because of the freedom! (: Humans are such contradictions. It's funny how when we're young we want to grow old and when we're old we want to reverse the clock.

Ok and so before I go to bed I decided to do a shoutout to the people in my life who have made this situation I'm in brighter and more optimistic. I'm stuck in a life circumstance where my patience is being tested and grinding my teeth through the unhappiness and uncertainty I'm feeling now. My least favourite feeling in life - uncertainty. Seriously try to avoid it. It's no good.

Here's my shoutout.

To my sis. Who's sick and feeling so sad yet so strong like my mother.
She told me to view her situation not with anger at life, but as a lesson.
Love her. Wish I never have to lose her. Never.

To my mom. Who's forced to lose her husband by life. And now facing a potential loss of her favourite daughter. She cried. She told life to take whatever it wants to. She gets upset.
But she's so resilent and so calm and collected when the going gets tough.

Next are my friends around me. Including Mr P. You guys know who you are. Thanks for the kind words of encouragement.

I use the phrase 'making lemonade out of lemons life deals to me'. My favourites from someof you are 'take it that life is adding bittergourd to fish soup' and some even gave me chocolates to cheer me up because it contains serotonin. Haha. Thank you all. I feel like dying but in the midst I smile.

I have so much to learn. I wish I never have to go through this phase, these feelings but sadly life chose me. Fat hope of leading a smooth sailing life. So many things have happened since I was born. More than the average person I think. Lol -_- makes my life journey colourful with a pinch of pain -_-

Wish I was a Californian girl with no worries or blues. My situation is not the worst, guess I should give thanks for that. (:

God bless everyone.

P.S I typed these on my iphone. Niceee.