closed chapter.

i realise i've been looking through pink-tinted sunglasses.

now i know that he never really knew me. the real me.
everything about me... he feels the opposite. i feel slightly mistaken actually.

i have mixed feelings regarding this.

for one, i feel sad. kinda heartbroken in fact.
because he never knew the real me.
the misconceptions are hurting, though i know it's not his fault. no blame game here. (:

just wanted to say:
no, i'm not that clumsy.
no, i'm not that inappropriate.
no, i'm not that dependent on anyone.
no, i'm not that soft.
no, i'm not what you made me out to be.

this is harsh (for me, cos i really liked you with my heart on my sleeve), but i guess i'm just not beautiful to you.

According to you
I'm difficult
Hard to please
Forever changing my mind
I'm a mess in a dress
Can't show up on time
Even if it would save my life
According to you
According to you

But according to him
I'm beautiful, incredible
He can't get me out of his head
According to him
I'm funny,irresistible
Everything he ever wanted
Everything is opposite
I don't feel like stopping it
So baby tell me what I got to lose
He's into me for everything I'm not
According to you

i feel something else too. a kind of understanding. the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle.
if he never knew the real me, perhaps that's why we never made it. maybe if he had more time, he might have gotten to know me better.

it's a pity, really, because we never got to know each other well. too young, we were.

a closed chapter.

but a new story starts here. no more feeling awkward.
cos this time,
it's a friendship.

(:

(not referring to ZQ by the way)